Tuesday, May 3, 2016

Quotes from the boys

I haven't posted these in a while so I thought I'd share some new quotes. The newer ones are at the bottom. 

Boy's Quotes
Weston
 "You have a reason and a brain and a heart, 'cause you love things. And you have fur. Like a lion."

Weston: God made us. He put 3 in my body. And Jesus gave me a heart. And everybody made my brain. And everybody made my reason.

Weston
"I don't have to go pee. See my hands? I'm not touching my hoo hoo."

Me: your fingers smell like hiney
W: smell them!
Me: no! Make daddy smell them!
Mark : no! It's Mother's Day. Make mom smell them. 
W: no it's happy daddy hiney hands day !

Quote of the day:
Lately we've had a lot of conversations with the boys about the recent deaths of African American men by officers, specifically the one in MO. 
Yesterday Oliver came to me very concerned, and said "Mom, I'm worried that the cop that shot that African American man is gonna get Obama."

After mark explained a heart attack to Oliver he said "I've heard of a heart attack many times but I didn't know it was that intensive."

"I know you think I'm looking at you but I'm just scratchin' my nuts."
-mark

Finn: I just saw a girl skateboarding!
Me: Girls can do anything!
Weston: Yeah like be Santa Clause. Yo ho ho and a bottle of Joe!
9/7/15

Me: What's a word that begins with the letter "G"?
West: Greasy. Greasy fingers. Did you know that poop has grease in it and if you stick your fingers in poop, your hands will be greasy?
9/7/15

A phrase I never though I'd hear myself say:
We don't have time to read books. You used up all of your time getting stuck in the Weeble Tree. 
-me

West: daddy, I love camping. It makes my heart happy. And my tummy.
9/11/15

Me: as soon as we get on the ferry you can get out of the car. 
Weston: And say 'Arg me hardy!' And 'Shiver me timbers!'
9/14/15

I wish I could pee out noodles. 
Weston
9/26/15

"Finger-ankles" (meaning: knuckles)
Weston 
10/4/15

Me: I'll put some on your plate with your burger. 
West: Oh, I don't like burgers. 
Me: I'm already cooking them
West: Thats really nice of you, but I don't like burgers. 
11/9/15

While playing restaurant
West: Sir! Do you mind if we pray for God? 
Finn: no that's fine. 
West: Ok. Mom, you pray. 
11/10/15

West: Mom! My water tastes tewible! It's has meat in it and icky stuff!
12/14/15

Weston, while watching the bad bird from Horton Hears A Who:
I wish we could find him and bake him, like a cake!
12/21/15

Exact quotes from a conversation Oliver and Aubrey just had....
Aubrey:Oliver!
Oliver:Nothing!
Aubrey:You're picking your nose!
Oliver:All men do it. Really. Especially when you're not looking.
12/29/15

So, this just happened
Actual conversation that took place while Weston was going potty: "Mom! Ew! What is that on the floor? Is it poop?! Mom, check if it's poop. Can you taste it? Mom! Mom! Give it a taste mom! It looks like poop. Here, wipe me and I'll taste it." 
I did not let him taste it, nor did I myself taste it. It was actually not poop. It was a dried leaf.

"I can't wait until I can do projects with working wood and nails like you mom"
Oliver 1/22/16 the compliment of my year:)

After explaining to Mark how I saw an elderly couple crossing the parking lot together, holding on for dear life, and how romantic it was. 
His reply: Thats just a symbiotic relationship. If they let go they'd fall down. 
2/14/16

Oliver Finley and Weston each mistook a bag of cotton balls for marshmallows throughout the day but Weston's reaction was priceless. He jumped on the counter yelling "Marshmallows! I can't believe it's marshmallows!" 
Then after I said "No, those aren't marshmallows."
He looked at them with his crooked, disgusted look and said "You gotta be kidding me! They're balls of hair!"
2/16/16

Finn: Oliver! You recognize that van, don't you? It's the government!
4/1/16

Finley was learning about ground waste and landfills. His lesson said to look up pictures of landfill waste. He said "I don't need to. I can just look in the backyard."

"If we're outside and it's dark, but we're not teens yet, can we say things like "What the hell?!" ?"
Finley 4/24/16

"Finn! Go, go! He's going to squirt you with water! Actually stay right there. I'm going to use you as bait."
-Oliver
4/25/16

After I made him go to sleep instead of talk. 
"You used to be so nice and now you're mean! You need to be nice like a unicorn or something."
Weston
4/26/16

W:"Daddy you smell really better now. Like fresh air from outside"
D:"Good. What did I smell like before?"
W:"Rotten eggs."

"Don't tickle me, it makes me too happy!"
Weston 5/3/16


2 comments:

Keegan said...

What fun! I love a bunch of these! Your boys are hilarious!

Becky Melby said...

Laughing like crazy here! You have the most creative-thinking kids ever. Absolutely the best way to end Mother's Day.