Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Three Brothers' Scruff

Mark recently submitted this article for something and I'm so proud I just had to share it!


Three Brothers' Scruff


There is an unspoken fraternity among those with facial hair. The beard has mystical powers, the source and potency of which is unknown to most. The ancient Egyptians, Greeks, and Romans all regarded the beard as a symbol of status and power, and a clean shave was frequently used as public humiliation. An old Greek saying expresses the virility of this symbol: "There are two kinds of people in this world that go around beardless—boys and women—and I am neither one."

No one seems to understand it's potential better than Green Bay's preseason trinity, consisting of Aaron Rodgers, Matt Flynn, and Graham Harrell. This triad of bearded brothers released their secret weapons on the unsuspecting Indianapolis Colts on Thursday night in the third preseason game of the year. It all began with Rodgers unleashing his furry fury, going 21 of 29 for 195 yards and three scores. In the second half, Flynn carried the trend with a impressive performance of 8 completions for 80 yards and two TD's. With less than a quarter remaining, Harrell put a cherry on top with four of his five attempts finding their homes for 62 yards, including a some critical conversions.

The beard renders it's gifts in unexpected forms. Maybe it's that little crumb of PowerBar stuck in your 'stache that provides a critical energy boost, or the stray whisker tickling your right nostril that invigorates your senses. When the blustery December winds render your opponents cold and numb, your fleece keeps you toasty and nimble. There has even been some speculation about the aerodynamics of a beard, which, like the dimples on a golf ball, may actually allow the bearer to move with greater ease and speed.

Take a look at some of the most influential bearded men in history: Santa Claus (he lives on the North Pole, need I say more?), Chuck Norris (no need to explain), Abe Lincoln (ended slavery), and Colonel Sanders (you know, the KFC guy), just to name a few. Who knows? In a few more years perhaps Aaron Rodgers will be on that list of barbate greats. Although Rodgers has been known to go beardless from time to time, let's face it: That baby-face just doesn't cut it on the gridiron.

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